how weird is it how something can so profoundly effect one’s life, only to slowly transcend into the realm of memories. what used to be above the surface has slipped below the line that separate conscious from the subconscious. outside of the jurisdiction of my awareness, i am still being influenced by past impressions, even after the poems i wrote so poignantly to relieve the pressure of my world when it caved in on me.
i used to think about it every second of every day, but not anymore. it comes when it pleases and leaves before i let it get too deep. it is pointless to let blood seep from a wound that should be healed, but i can feel it all over again when i want to, although i don’t know why i would.
it came across my mind today out of pure coincidence. i admit this is the 7th anniversary, but as each year passes, the mental reenactments start to play less frequently. i can rest peacefully knowing that i weathered the storm, transformed, and stand taller today than ever before. sometimes, still, i can’t but explore that moment frozen in time.
and so i celebrate my shadow, because without it, my shine wouldn’t be as bright.