“Our sex doesn’t tell us no lies.“
Focus becomes farcical, so we are more productive when we multitask. We are without a doubt mentally flexible, but in order to avoid a nervous breakdown and balance this energy, we must keep our bodies just as limber as our minds. Our actions may seem to contradict our words at this time, but The Twins represent the duality of mind and body, and they reserve the right to experience life from every possible point of view. Remember, when in doubt, do both!
Have you ever seen someone you know in a porno? I’m not talking about a leaked nude or an amateur, homemade video clip on xtube. I’m talking about a legit porn film, with a script and a storyline and everything. I was minding my own business last night, surfing the forbidden netherworld of the internets, when all sudden I saw a familiar face with a voice that I knew very well. Talk about a curveball!
At first I thought I was trippin. This man on my screen had to be some sort of doppelgänger. He couldn’t possibly be the man I thought he was, seeing as how that man was super professional and too well put together to dabble in something as decadent and lewd as pornography. These, of course, were surface judgments, as I never get to know him that well. He was one of the staff members at my internship and I hardly ever engaged with him. For discretion’s sake I won’t say where I interned in this post (although I have mentioned it previously in another post), but it was a major association for playwrights in New York City with a lot of big name members and councilmen. After some meticulous research, I found out that this “actor” was indeed the man I thought he was.
I was so intrigued by this revelation because I worked in the same vicinity as this guy for a whole semester and never even knew. Naturally, I began to imagine every possible scenario of his double life. Did everyone else there know he was a porn star, and if so, what did they say when they found out? Did he think I knew he was a porn star, and if so, did that excite him? If I did know he was a porn star, would I have been more open to talking to him? Truthfully, I wasn’t very social with anyone at my internship. I felt out of my element because they were all more passionate about theatre than I was. Plus they were all older and mostly of European descent, so there wasn’t much of an immediate common ground. I stayed to myself because I thought of them as elitists of some sort and I never want to say or do the wrong thing. Little did I know my desk was 3 feet away from the office of a closet freak.
My dear friend Asha once told me that we (humans) should be touched at least 5 times a day. I probably laughed. I didn’t (probably) laugh because it was funny. This concept was foreign to me is all. She is a Taurus, my polar opposite. No wonder.
Scorpio feels, but Taurus touches. If you are confused, believe me when I tell you; there is a difference. The difference is in the element of sensitivity. Both signs are sensitive, but that sensitivity is expressed in opposite ways. Scorpio is emotionally sensitive [feelings]. Taurus is physically sensitive [touch]. This is not to say The Scorpion doesn’t do a fair amount of touching. After all Scorpio has a reputation for being the sexpot of the Zodiac. I believe, however, as a Scorpio, that I live in the world of the unseen. The untouchable. The intangible. The mystery.
Shining a light on your shadow can solve even the most riddling mysteries. With Mars [action], Venus [interaction] and the Sun [conscious expression] in Taurus, I am being confronted by the opposition of my shadow. I am embracing it, though.
So far this Taurus Season, I have challenged myself to indulge in my sensuality. One of the perks of being a full time spa attendant is constant access to professional massage therapists and estheticians. This week alone, I have treated myself to 2 massages (my first and second massages ever). They were so different, so I can’t compare them, but they were both beautiful experiences.
Every so often I would catch myself clenching or holding tension (especially in my glutes/legs) when I felt their hands upon my skin. It was totally unconscious, but after a while I would notice and release. This even happens outside of massages sometimes. I figure this reaction to touch is much more than skin deep. It has to be rooted in some type of fear, some type of childhood trauma that was never integrated. Maybe I’m reaching, but what else could it be? When did I cut myself off from being able to experience physical pleasure? When did I discount the value of touch?
Regardless, I feel better already. These massages have opened this Scorpio up to the wonderful world of the five senses. Skin to skin contact is important in such a fundamental way, as well as other forms of sensual pleasure. Just as I am tempted to indulge in fear, I am equally allowed to feel love and live in love. That is one of my Full Moon in Scorpio realizations, if not THE realization.
I am balancing. I am transcending. I am alive.
Now, I just have to figure out how to be touched at least 5 times a day without getting arrested. This will be a test of my creativity. I am an art major (and a Scorpio sexpot), so this is a challenge I gladly accept.
What we value is being transformed by the revelation of a mystery. If yesterday is history, then why is the present tense? Flexibility is perplexing, but there is great release in the occasional stretch. Although we’re being pulled in opposite directions, balance is the selection to ensure cosmic protection.
There is pain in every pleasure.
There is power in every potential.
There is passion in every peace.